08-20-2026

Hey friends 🩵

This week has been a lot. Not bad. Not catastrophic. Just…a lot.

I’m looking for housing. I’m looking for more stable work. I’m applying for positions, talking to recruiters, finishing up a long pet sit, working with clients, producing a podcast, writing this newsletter, creating daily videos, and trying to keep several projects moving that matter deeply to me.

And somewhere in the middle of all of that, I caught myself asking the same question over and over again:

How am I supposed to do all of this? Then I realized something.

Maybe I’m not.

I recently saw a video listing all the things we’re apparently supposed to do every day to be healthy, successful, emotionally regulated humans.

• Get eight hours of sleep
• Wake up early
• Get morning sunlight.
• Meditate
• Journal
• Practice gratitude
• Drink enough water
• Take your supplements
• Eat real food.
• Walk 10,000 steps
• Strength train
• Stretch
• Read 10 pages
• Work
• Advance your career
• Spend quality time with your partner
• Be present with your kids
• Maintain friendships
• Keep the house clean
• Meal prep
• Manage your finances

And don’t forget to REST!! But make sure you’re resting correctly. 😂

Somewhere along the way, we’ve turned being human into a performance review. Even wellness can become another form of achievement.

Meditation becomes, I didn’t meditate today.

Exercise becomes, I only got 6,000 steps.

Rest becomes, I should be doing something productive.

Parenting becomes, I didn’t spend enough quality time with my kids.

Personal development becomes, I should be further along by now.

And suddenly, self-care becomes self-criticism wearing yoga pants.

Maybe the problem isn’t that we need better time management. Maybe we’ve accepted an impossible definition of what a “good day” is supposed to contain. Because we have finite capacity.

One body. One nervous system. One attention span. And our capacity changes depending on the season we’re in.

Someone caring for a newborn doesn’t have the same bandwidth as someone whose children are grown.

Someone moving doesn’t have the same capacity as someone settled in their home.

Someone navigating grief, illness, divorce, job loss, caregiving, or financial uncertainty doesn’t have the same available energy as someone whose life feels relatively stable. And yet we often hold ourselves to the exact same standard anyway.

Then when we can’t keep up, we make it personal.

• Why can’t I focus?
• Why am I so unproductive?
• Why am I falling behind?

Maybe you’re not falling behind. Maybe your life currently requires your energy somewhere else. I’ve been sitting with one idea in particular this week:

Your priorities should be seasonal, not permanent.

Something can matter deeply without requiring the majority of your attention right now.

• You can love a project and make it smaller for a season
• You can care about your health and choose sleep over the gym one morning
• You can love your family and still say you’re unavailable tonight.
• You can have a dream and also do what is necessary to create stability underneath it.

Priority isn’t a declaration of what matters most to you forever. It’s simply a decision about where your finite resources are needed now.

So instead of asking myself, How am I going to do everything? I’m trying to ask something different: What actually needs me right now? That question feels much kinder. And much more useful

This Thursday on (re)Parenting Radio, I’m going much deeper into this—including a very personal look at the season I’m navigating right now and six questions I’m using to decide what deserves my attention, what can wait, and what I’m allowed to make smaller.

Because I’m learning something in real time:

I don’t have to know how the whole story ends to know what needs my attention today.

Have a beautiful week, friends. 🤍

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