05-09-2026

Hey friends 🤍

This week I’ve been thinking a lot about time.

Not the clock on the wall, but the quiet pressure many people carry around it.

The feeling of being behind.

⏰ Behind in life.
⏰ Behind in business.
⏰ Behind in parenting.
⏰ Behind in healing.
⏰ Behind in becoming the person you thought you would be by now.

What’s interesting is that this feeling often shows up even when nothing is actually wrong.

• Life is stable.
• Things are moving.
• People are doing their best.

And yet there is still a subtle internal pressure that whispers:

You should be further along.

I see this all the time when I work with clients.

The truth is that this feeling rarely has anything to do with time itself.

It has to do with programming.

Many of the messages we received growing up had a strong relationship with urgency and productivity.

• Don't waste time.
• Hurry up!!
• Be useful.
• Do something productive.
• Don't fall behind.

Most of these messages were well intentioned, but over time they become internalized.

Eventually they form something I talk about on the podcast called The Scoreboard Self, the part of us that is constantly measuring life.

⌚️ Am I doing enough?
⌚️ Am I far enough along?
⌚️ Am I moving fast enough?
⌚️ Have I walked enough steps?
⌚️ Do I look young enough still?

The tricky part is that this scoreboard usually gets installed long before we are old enough to question it.

So we grow up believing the pressure we feel is simply how life works.

But when you start paying attention, you realize something important. The clock is not actually chasing you. A program is, and programs can be updated.

This is one of the reasons inner child work can be so powerful. When we begin looking at where our emotional reactions and pressures were first installed, something shifts.

We stop assuming our current feelings are truth. Instead, we begin recognizing them as patterns that were learned. And learned patterns can always be rewritten.

I recently recorded a podcast episode about this dynamic 🎙️ The Scoreboard Self: Productivity as a Safety Strategy It explores how many adults unknowingly tie their sense of safety, worth, and identity to how much they accomplish. If you have ever felt like you cannot relax until everything is done, or like the finish line moves the moment you reach it, you may recognize yourself in that conversation. You can listen to the episode HERE​

Before you go this week, here is something to sit with:

Q: Where in your life do you feel behind, and whose voice first taught you to measure it that way?

With strength and alignment,

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