Hey Tribe,

Have you ever found yourself stuck in the same frustrating patterns in your relationships? Whether it's with your mother, in-laws, kids, spouse, or even your boss, these dynamics can feel inescapable.

This week, I’m diving into a topic that has profoundly impacted my journey and the work I do with clients: THE LOOPS IN OUR RELATIONSHIPS.

I want to share how awareness to and understanding these patterns can lead to healthier, more liberated relationships or all kinds.👫

RELATIONSHIP DYNAMICS You may recognize some of these in yours ​ Emotionally Unavailable Partners or Friends 😔 Always Being the One Who Gives More 🤲 Highs and Lows (Push-Pull Dynamics) 🎢 Repeated Betrayal, Abandonment, or Letdowns 💔 Feeling Unseen, Unheard, or Having to Earn Importance 👀 Controlling, Overbearing, or Domineering Personalities 🧊 Needing to Save, Fix, or Heal Others 🛠️ Emotionally Unstable, Chaotic, or Inconsistent Behaviors 🌪️ One-Sided Relationships ⚖️ Immature Individuals Who Can’t Meet You at Your Level 👶 Indecisive, Hesitant, or Noncommittal Partners 🤔 Distant, Detached, or Unresponsive to Your Emotional Needs You Feel More Like a Parent Than a Partner 👩‍👧 Those Who Struggle with Accountability and Avoid Responsibility 🙈

By recognizing these relationship patterns, we can transform how we interact with others and break free from cycles that no longer serve us. ✨

Understanding Relationship Patterns

Relationships are frequency-based exchanges reflecting deeper energetic patterns. The dynamics we encounter in our relationships are not random but are influenced by personal, generational, or collective frequencies.

You might be the point of resolution for patterns that didn’t start with you—meaning you are here to BREAK GENERATIONAL PATTERNS!! Woo hoo 🎉

Personal Story: Navigating Emotional Unavailability

Let me share a personal experience that illustrates how understanding and taking responsibility for these dynamics can transform our interactions. 🌟

Recently, I was having coffee with a friend. During our conversation, I offered a bid for connection, sharing something personal and emotional—hoping for validation. ☕️

Instead, she deflected, leaving me feeling unseen and unheard. This wasn't the first time I have felt this way with this particular friend—it was It was a common occurrence. 😔

In the past, I might have tried to get her to validate me or express how it was hurtful that she didn’t.

However, the real, not-so-obvious reason I am in this relationship and have subjected myself to her invalidation is to reinforce the pattern of seeking approval and feeling invalidated (on a subconscious level).

This behavior within relationships has been the norm since my early childhood and is what feels ‘normal’ and safe to me.

This is how it works. This is why the loops continue. 🔄

Now that I have this understanding and am committed to closing loops that no longer serve me, I chose a different path.

I recognized the familiar pattern and decided not to engage with it. It was as if a wall had appeared between us. Rather than trying to dismantle the wall, I simply stopped right in front of it and then turned away, letting the moment be what it was—without judgment or feelings of victimization. Simply acceptance and observation.

This approach felt odd and even a bit empty at first. But in that space, I found freedom. 🛣️ By not engaging with, or judging the pattern, I allowed it to lose its power over me. 🕊️

Practical Steps to Break Unwanted Relationship Patterns

• Recognize the Emotional Hook: Identify what initially attracts you to certain dynamics. 🧲 Some Examples:
  1. If you find yourself drawn to emotionally unavailable partners, ask yourself if their unpredictability feels familiar or exciting. This may stem from a past where love was inconsistent.
  2. If you often play the role of the caregiver, consider whether this role fulfills a need to feel needed or valued, possibly rooted in childhood experiences.
  3. If you’re attracted to high-drama relationships, reflect on whether the intensity mimics patterns of approval and attention you’ve experienced before.
• Stop Engaging with Partial Presence: Disengage from relationships that require significant effort to maintain. 🚫
• Shift from Potential to Presence: See people as they are, not as you hope they’ll become. 👁️
• Accept Ease as Alignment: Relationships should not be hard - this includes family. 🌈
• Let Absence of Struggle Be Your Baseline: Embrace stability as your new normal. 🌿

Observing this process as it unfolds allows you to disrupt it. The first step is identifying the emotional trigger—what draws you in before you're even aware. 🪝

It might be a desire for approval, a sense of duty, fear of conflict, or expecting rejection. Once you identify the trigger, you can pause rather than react automatically. This pause is where the pattern begins to lose its grip.

By not engaging at the trigger point, the cycle can't sustain itself. Even if the other person tries to continue the loop, it won’t affect you in the same way. 😤

The usual dynamic feels off, like the script has changed. Over time, by not engaging as you used to, the pattern weakens. Relationships will either adjust to a new dynamic or fade away, as the old pattern is no longer reinforced.

Shifting from reaction to awareness changes the energy. Your goal is not to force a resolution but to see things clearly. Once a pattern is fully recognized, it loses its power. 🔍

The biggest transformation is realizing that nothing feels personal. If someone is present, they are. If not, they aren't. Their actions don’t control your emotional state because you're no longer seeking meaning, validation, or certainty from the connection.

When someone leaves, it doesn’t feel like abandonment. If they stay, it doesn’t feel like gain. People move in and out of your life naturally, without force, struggle, or resistance. This is what it means to live in the NOW moment.

Final Thoughts

As I continue to work through these patterns in my relationships, I’ve come to see relationships as expressions of connection, not containers for unresolved energy. This shift has brought me depth and freedom in my relationships, allowing love to exist without conditions or expectations. 🌼

⚠️ WARNING: This shift may lead you to a significantly smaller circle of people in your life, but the quality of the relationships will outweigh the quantity.

You may even find yourself quite alone while your hologram configures to the new coding, but trust me: The only way to break the cycle of endless repetition is to acknowledge the patterns and choose a new path.

RELATIONSHIP STRUGGLES YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO IT ALONE!🤝 ​ Are you ready to embrace change and transform your relationships? ​ Let me be your guide on this journey to healthier, more fulfilling connections. 🚀 ​ Whether you're seeking to break free from old patterns or deepen your understanding of relational dynamics, I'm here to support you every step of the way. 🧭✨ ​ Contact me today to set up private coaching sessions, available by the hour or through package pricing. 📞💬 ​ Embark on an empowering relationship adventure with a guide who's been there, right by your side! 💪 ​ EMAIL ME HERE TO INQUIRE

Thank you for joining me this week.

I hope this perspective inspires you to explore your own relationship patterns and embrace the possibility of liberated love.

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